9 Things to Do on Halloween Besides Beg for Candy
April 19, 2019
You’re officially too old for trick-or-treating (and still haven’t emotionally healed from having to say goodbye to allll that free candy — so long, king-sized Milky Ways), but the alternative — getting dressed up in something gaudy and going on a Halloween party crawl — feels, well…kind of meh.
What’s the true Halloween lover to do? Start by skipping the house parties and bar crawls and instead opt for one of these 10 kooky, creative, and yes, spooky events. From candy and cheese pairing classes to 24 straight hours of horror film gore, you’ll feel like Jack Skellington himself by the time the holiday’s through.
1. THE MASSACRE: 24 HOURS OF HORROR FILMS MADNESS, CHICAGO (10/14-10/15): Know your Argentos from your Cravens? If you're a bona fide horror movie geek, now's the time to plan your quest to Chicago's Patio Theater. A favorite annual tradition, the venue will host The Massacre: 24 Hours of Horror Films Madness this year. Show up at noon and, if you want, stay all the way until noon the next day. Sleeping is optional, but a pillowcase full of candy is required.
Photo courtesy of the Portage Theatre.
2. IMPROVBOSTON'S GOREFEST: XV HORROR HOUSE, BOSTON (10/19-10/31): Pro-tip: don't show up to GoreFest wearing white...or anything nice, really. The name here is a giveaway: put on every year by the inventive ImprovBoston, this gloriously gruesome show sees the performers – and audience members – doused in buckets of (fake) blood, Carrie-style. Consider the entire venue as a splash zone.
Photo courtesy of Ryan Kelly Coil.
3. THE TOMPKINS SQUARE HALLOWEEN DOG PARADE, NEW YORK (10/21): The Village Halloween Parade is a New York tradition, but that also means sharing your personal space with a lot of witches, vampires, and Game of Thrones characters. But New York's got another parade on offer: the Tompkins Square Halloween Dog Parade, which sees dozens of the city's prettiest pooches congregate on the Lower East Side. Dachshunds dressed up as wieners! Princess pugs! People wearing costumes are so last year.
Photo courtesy of Drew Mokris/Flickr.
4. THE 17th STREET HIGH HEEL RACE, WASHINGTON, D.C. (10/24): For drag queens, dressing up is an art form – and there's no better time to show off some serious sartorial skill than on Halloween. A longstanding DC tradition, the 17th Street High Heel Race sees the city's foxiest broads strap on their stilettos – and over-the-top costumes – for a fabulously fierce nighttime event.
Photo courtesy of Ted Eytan/Flickr.
5. CHEESE AND CANDY PAIRING CLASS, AUSTIN (10/27): What goes better together than cheese and crackers? Cheese and, uh...candy? As unlikely as the combination sounds, the expert cheesemongers at Austin's Antonelli's Cheese Shop are out to prove that candy corn and curds can be the best of friends. If you come in costume, you may just earn yourself a few extra samples.
Photo courtesy of Antonelli’s Cheese Shop.
6. 80S VIDEO DANCE ATTACK HALLOWEEN PARTY, PORTLAND (10/27): The best complement to your on-point Thriller-era Michael Jackson costume? Why, an 80s soundtrack, of course! If your tastes skew, oh, thirty years back, don't miss the 80s Video Dance Attack Halloween Party in Portland. You may want to get a group together and prep your choreography beforehand.
Photo courtesy of 80s Video Dance Attack.
7. FREAKNIGHT FESTIVAL, SEATTLE (10/27): So you love to listen to EDM while watching circus performers and going on carnival rides. We've got just the thing for you: FreakNight, billed as one of the northwest's biggest Halloween traditions. When you're not losing your mind during the DJ's sets, keep an eye out for the delightfully creepy sideshow performers. Bring a big sack of candy with you – you'll need the sugar to keep you going all night.
Photo courtesy of PhotoBones.
8. TERROR BEHIND THE WALLS AT THE EASTERN STATE PENITENTIARY, PHILADELPHIA (until 11/11): Forget the "haunted houses" you went to as a kid – i.e., your school cafeteria covered in tin foil and toilet paper mummies. If you're after authentic frights, it doesn't get much scarier than the infamous Eastern State Penitentiary in Philadelphia. Once a notorious correctional facility, it's haunted enough to rival Alcatraz, and its Terror Behind the Walls Halloween tour will have you convinced you're crossing paths with malevolent spirits.
Photo courtesy of Jeff Fusco.
9. DIA DE LOS MUERTOS PROCESSION, SAN FRANCISCO (11/2): Long before Halloween was associated with grubby-pawed trick-or-treaters on sugar benders, Dia de los Muertos, or the Day of the Dead, was the original ghostly holiday. A traditional Mexican event, Dia de Los Muertos is celebrated each year in San Francisco's Mission District, where a nighttime procession of attendees in calavera makeup is a spooky sight to behold.
Photo courtesy of Jared Zimmerman.
1. THE MASSACRE: 24 HOURS OF HORROR FILMS MADNESS, CHICAGO (10/14-10/15): Know your Argentos from your Cravens? If you're a bona fide horror movie geek, now's the time to plan your quest to Chicago's Patio Theater. A favorite annual tradition, the venue will host The Massacre: 24 Hours of Horror Films Madness this year. Show up at noon and, if you want, stay all the way until noon the next day. Sleeping is optional, but a pillowcase full of candy is required.
Photo courtesy of the Portage Theatre.
2. IMPROVBOSTON'S GOREFEST: XV HORROR HOUSE, BOSTON (10/19-10/31): Pro-tip: don't show up to GoreFest wearing white...or anything nice, really. The name here is a giveaway: put on every year by the inventive ImprovBoston, this gloriously gruesome show sees the performers – and audience members – doused in buckets of (fake) blood, Carrie-style. Consider the entire venue as a splash zone.
Photo courtesy of Ryan Kelly Coil.
3. THE TOMPKINS SQUARE HALLOWEEN DOG PARADE, NEW YORK (10/21): The Village Halloween Parade is a New York tradition, but that also means sharing your personal space with a lot of witches, vampires, and Game of Thrones characters. But New York's got another parade on offer: the Tompkins Square Halloween Dog Parade, which sees dozens of the city's prettiest pooches congregate on the Lower East Side. Dachshunds dressed up as wieners! Princess pugs! People wearing costumes are so last year.
Photo courtesy of Drew Mokris/Flickr.
4. THE 17th STREET HIGH HEEL RACE, WASHINGTON, D.C. (10/24): For drag queens, dressing up is an art form – and there's no better time to show off some serious sartorial skill than on Halloween. A longstanding DC tradition, the 17th Street High Heel Race sees the city's foxiest broads strap on their stilettos – and over-the-top costumes – for a fabulously fierce nighttime event.
Photo courtesy of Ted Eytan/Flickr.
5. CHEESE AND CANDY PAIRING CLASS, AUSTIN (10/27): What goes better together than cheese and crackers? Cheese and, uh...candy? As unlikely as the combination sounds, the expert cheesemongers at Austin's Antonelli's Cheese Shop are out to prove that candy corn and curds can be the best of friends. If you come in costume, you may just earn yourself a few extra samples.
Photo courtesy of Antonelli’s Cheese Shop.
6. 80S VIDEO DANCE ATTACK HALLOWEEN PARTY, PORTLAND (10/27): The best complement to your on-point Thriller-era Michael Jackson costume? Why, an 80s soundtrack, of course! If your tastes skew, oh, thirty years back, don't miss the 80s Video Dance Attack Halloween Party in Portland. You may want to get a group together and prep your choreography beforehand.
Photo courtesy of 80s Video Dance Attack.
7. FREAKNIGHT FESTIVAL, SEATTLE (10/27): So you love to listen to EDM while watching circus performers and going on carnival rides. We've got just the thing for you: FreakNight, billed as one of the northwest's biggest Halloween traditions. When you're not losing your mind during the DJ's sets, keep an eye out for the delightfully creepy sideshow performers. Bring a big sack of candy with you – you'll need the sugar to keep you going all night.
Photo courtesy of PhotoBones.
8. TERROR BEHIND THE WALLS AT THE EASTERN STATE PENITENTIARY, PHILADELPHIA (until 11/11): Forget the "haunted houses" you went to as a kid – i.e., your school cafeteria covered in tin foil and toilet paper mummies. If you're after authentic frights, it doesn't get much scarier than the infamous Eastern State Penitentiary in Philadelphia. Once a notorious correctional facility, it's haunted enough to rival Alcatraz, and its Terror Behind the Walls Halloween tour will have you convinced you're crossing paths with malevolent spirits.
Photo courtesy of Jeff Fusco.
9. DIA DE LOS MUERTOS PROCESSION, SAN FRANCISCO (11/2): Long before Halloween was associated with grubby-pawed trick-or-treaters on sugar benders, Dia de los Muertos, or the Day of the Dead, was the original ghostly holiday. A traditional Mexican event, Dia de Los Muertos is celebrated each year in San Francisco's Mission District, where a nighttime procession of attendees in calavera makeup is a spooky sight to behold.
Photo courtesy of Jared Zimmerman.
